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Crofton, MD, 21114

A long-running personal blog shared by two authors with completely different approaches to life. And a lot of large, beautiful photographs of dogs and nature and places we've traveled to. Rich in commentary and irreverant in style. 

Blog

We started blogging a long time ago. Our work hours never aligned with recommended psychotherapists and we needed to get our thoughts out. We are great friends, total opposites and long-time housemates. This was a way to communicate. With each other. With strangers. With consumer marketers. With sub-par meteorologists. With distant friends who wanted to see pictures of stuff we were up to.

This is the place. Our bucket of thoughts to share. You are welcome. 
(We realize that most of you are here for the dog pictures.)

Tazers and Superior Bed Linens

Healey

I am making my roommate/co-work watch ‘Sunrise Earth’ on Discovery HD. They are in China in this stepped mountainside where there is a very organized form of farming going on. I am trying to explain to her what they are farming (I am making all of it up. But she is the new kind of Chinese. The kind that can customize your Blackberry to receive your dog’s thoughts and your stock quotes within a nano-second – but is unaware of how blankets get made.


So I am explaining rice farming to her. I love this show. There is a guy just grabbing handfuls of mud and making a retention wall out of it. It’s delightfully horrifying. We are transfixed by the high definition images being portrayed on the 70 inch tv that looms above our office computers.


At the very same time…we are discussing how it was that she came to be ‘tazed’ in college. She keeps trying to tell me the story – but I don’t want her reality to erode the magical story I have fabricated up in my mind. Mine is hysterical. Her story begins to sound more…explainable. I don’t want that story. I want the one where I thought she and her friends had gotten mad and rowdy at a college midnight picnic where a science experiment went wrong on the commons and the Blacksburg police were called. And she ultimately went back for the cooler and was zapped by a Don Knots looking officer – partly out of his mind in confusion at the scattering of the Mensa club around him. “Normally they aren’t like this” he thinks to himself.


We move on to a story that her brother shared with her. Her brother is an Army Ranger or some sort of overly prepared type. Like the rest of her family, he suffers from a high IQ. This condition has kept most of her family from being able to happily socialize with the general public. But they are fine with that. The general public is ignorant, inefficient and difficult to be patient with. So her brother was telling her this little known fact that the reason the armed forces got rid of both tazers and sand bag guns is…that the troops ultimately used them against themselves out of boredom. I can totally see that.


I am realizing that I am not going to be getting an actual vacation this summer.
This saddens me. Deeply.


So I am going to start making up bogus vacation plans to entertain myself. I have decided to go through the Relais & Chateaux directory of fine destinations. I am familiar with this directory because I benefitted from it GREATLY as a child. {Thank you again Mom}.


Okay – so when asked for any destination requirements – my roommate gave me that “really? …are you asking ‘me’ this?” look. “Alright…so there has to be wireless. I understand that. Stop looking at me like that. I meant anything else. Is there anything else, besides wireless?” Long pause. “A pool”? Okay. So wireless and a pool. And my requirement is that they have SUPERIOR sheets. We can have an adjoining suite. I will now begin my search for our dream vacation.


If anyone else finds something they would like to recommend as a possible option - please send me the name and/or link. Remember it has to be Relais & Chateaux this week. Next week we’ll try another self-inflated travel company.