I’m watching the baseball game. I never watch baseball. I only ever watch the World Series. My favorite team is the team playing the Yankees. I love to hate the Yankees.
Hating the Yankees is the new American pastime. My dad – on the other hand- likes to cheer loudly for the Yankees. He doesn’t actually like them…he just does it to irritate my mother. She is from Boston. My dad doesn’t always get along with her family. He’s like sand in their pants most of the time. He is happy with the level of irritation he shares, friends and family alike.
So I opted to go to the lazy dog park again this morning. The park where I just stand there and chat up the regulars while my dogs run wild. Well one of them at least. Hambone basically sits on my shoe the whole time looking for signals that we’re leaving. Strange dog. And Thor gets the shit beaten out of himself over and over again. You’d think he was flavored, to watch the amount of dogs that go after him. But there were no regulars there this morning. Just brunette females with yappy dogs. This one chick who decided she knew me was standing there chatting me up while holding a bag of her dogs shit. She had completely forgotten what was in this bag. She kept motioning with it. Gesturing with it. SWINGING IT IN MY DIRECTION. Completely consumed with this dumb story about how her husband did a crap job of seeding their lawn. (yawn). Hey crazy bitch – stop swinging your dogs stinking turds at my face. Do you not see me bobbing and weaving in front of you? This isn’t a palsy I’m dealing with – it’s disgust.
In other news – it’s Fashion Week in our Nations Capitol.
Tee hee. [Technical Note- it’s the capitol of Gov’t…not Fashion]
WTF are these people thinking? I actually remember last years ‘fashions’ and – it will be hard to believe this – but this years are actually better. No kidding.
Dear Coco Chanel, We have found the basement of fashion. Surprise, surprise ..it’s in the US.
I almost want to go down to these shows and interview the models. They all look so miserable. I just know they have priceless views on these garments that need to be shared. I strongly suggest that you sign up for the mailing list. Last year the models were wearing those plastic medical collars they give to dogs so they don’t chew themselves. I remember almost spitting up my coffee at my desk when I saw it. Fucking priceless.